Kinda Like the Anticlimactic Ending to This Story
"This outfit is gaaaaaaawgis. Just look at this skirt!"
The lady sitting in front of me on the bus took a jacket and skirt out of the suit bag she had folded on her lap and displayed the two to the younger girl standing in the aisle. I looked up to see how gawgis the outfit was. The jacket was black with a wide, rounded lapel and the black skirt had accordion pleats. Nothing new, nothing special.
"Wow!" the girl standing in the aisle said.
"I showed it to my 20 year-old nieces," the lady directly in front of me said, "and they tried it on they thought it was so nice. Classic. Ya gonna have this fah life."
Girl in the Aisle's mother came down to the back of the bus to see the goods and Girl in the Aisle hung the jacket and skirt on the overhead storage shelf. They oohed and aahed while the woman in front of me asked the lady next to her to take out the next skirt.
"You might not like this one," she warned, "it's a little weird."
A little weird? I couldn't imagine what this lady who thought turning a bus ride into the city into a showroom considered weird and braced myself for the splashes of clashing colors, asymmetrical patterns, and interesting hemlines I was sure were about to blow Girl in the Aisle and myself away. The lady picked a black skirt up and held it eye level to Girl in the Aisle. Ooooh, she's holding us in suspense, I thought. Leading us on with a procession of boring clothes first.
"See? I told you it's weird."
Girl in the Aisle scrunched her face into dislike.
"It's the pleat in the front, right?"
Girl in the Aisle nodded her head and turned to show her mother how wonderful the accordion pleat skirt was. Left disappointed by the anticlimactic skirt, I glanced at Zahava who was davening in the seat next to mine.
"Did you notice," she said when she was done, "that every 'gorgeous' piece of clothing that woman picked up was black? I think I accidentally shot them a rude look when I finally got a look at that weird skirt."
The lady sitting in front of me on the bus took a jacket and skirt out of the suit bag she had folded on her lap and displayed the two to the younger girl standing in the aisle. I looked up to see how gawgis the outfit was. The jacket was black with a wide, rounded lapel and the black skirt had accordion pleats. Nothing new, nothing special.
"Wow!" the girl standing in the aisle said.
"I showed it to my 20 year-old nieces," the lady directly in front of me said, "and they tried it on they thought it was so nice. Classic. Ya gonna have this fah life."
Girl in the Aisle's mother came down to the back of the bus to see the goods and Girl in the Aisle hung the jacket and skirt on the overhead storage shelf. They oohed and aahed while the woman in front of me asked the lady next to her to take out the next skirt.
"You might not like this one," she warned, "it's a little weird."
A little weird? I couldn't imagine what this lady who thought turning a bus ride into the city into a showroom considered weird and braced myself for the splashes of clashing colors, asymmetrical patterns, and interesting hemlines I was sure were about to blow Girl in the Aisle and myself away. The lady picked a black skirt up and held it eye level to Girl in the Aisle. Ooooh, she's holding us in suspense, I thought. Leading us on with a procession of boring clothes first.
"See? I told you it's weird."
Girl in the Aisle scrunched her face into dislike.
"It's the pleat in the front, right?"
Girl in the Aisle nodded her head and turned to show her mother how wonderful the accordion pleat skirt was. Left disappointed by the anticlimactic skirt, I glanced at Zahava who was davening in the seat next to mine.
"Did you notice," she said when she was done, "that every 'gorgeous' piece of clothing that woman picked up was black? I think I accidentally shot them a rude look when I finally got a look at that weird skirt."
posted by BrownsvilleGirl at 11:55 PM
Monsey Trails strikes again?! One of the Touro girls I know suggested we put together a book of the outrageous and unbelieveable behaviors and conversations we've been subjected to on the bus.
What do you say, Deanster? You can get contributing authorship!
'Cept that I don't know how funny any of it is to people who haven't experienced it. And I don't want contributing authorship, I want editor rights. That's my calling in life--editing.
You've got a long road ahead of you, then, darling. But a fun one.
And the MT stories are truly universal in their appeal. Who can't relate to the irresistible urge to throttle that hotshot real-estate hocker doing business in the back row, on SPEAKERPHONE, during his morning commute?