Tuesday, September 20, 2005

I Want to Be a Stay-At-Home Mom

Well! Would you look at the jewel of an article I just found in the NYTimes?

At Yale and other top colleges, women are being groomed to take their place in an ever more diverse professional elite. It is almost taken for granted that, just as they make up half the students at these institutions, they will move into leadership roles on an equal basis with their male classmates.
There is just one problem with this scenario: many of these women say that is not what they want.
Alright, so the article focuses on women in Ivy League schools (something of which Hunter surely is not), but they do this mainly because they assume that women in ivy league schools will marry men who will be capable of providing for their families, which is unlike women who go to, for example, public schools, who'll probably have to work just to make ends meet.

Much attention has been focused on career women who leave the work force to rear children. What seems to be changing is that while many women in college two or three decades ago expected to have full-time careers, their daughters, while still in college, say they have already decided to suspend or end their careers when they have children.
Yes! Yes! This is me! Thank you, NYTimes editor, for showing the world my ways are common!!!

What seems new is that while many of their mothers expected to have hard-charging careers, then scaled back their professional plans only after having children, the women of this generation expect their careers to take second place to child rearing.
Yes, I just pasted that in similar words a moment ago...

For most of the young women who responded to e-mail questions, a major factor shaping their attitudes seemed to be their experience with their own mothers, about three out of five of whom did not work at all, took several years off or worked only part time.
This reminds me of my 11th grade Shabbaton. Our mechanechet wanted us all to be working women so that we could support learning husbands. That wasn't something any of us found interest in (I think), but still, Friday night there was a panel discussion with four women who were leading the kind of lifestyle our teacher wanted us to want. One woman on the panel made the mistake of mocking stay-at-home moms saying something along the lines of, "women who don't work just spend their time shopping and getting their nails done." That woman was ripped to shreds.
Over half of my high school class had mothers who didn't work. For some of us, our mothers didn't go back to work until after our youngest siblings were in school. And what we saw were mothers who made sure to be home by 4 to wait at the corner for our youngest siblings to come home (most of us had siblings around our own age, so we had walking buddies :)), mothers who would shop for us and have clothing waiting on our beds for when we'd get home, etc. And we had nothing but respect for them.

11 original thoughts out there

Anonymous ian macantifeminist said...

I think its admirable to want to be a stay at home mom (or dad) and that there is no more important job in the world...well, other than being President, or a diplomat who averts wars...or a cancer researcher, or... OK, so there are other more important ones, but its still very important and admirable.

You said your mechanechet wanted you all to be "working women." I thought Judaism forbids prostitution. You learn something new every day.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 10:52:00 AM  
Anonymous brown eyed girl said...


Tuesday, September 20, 2005 11:39:00 AM  
Blogger The Nucular Jew said...

I think a stay at home mom is a very imporant job. That's your future, why not invest in it?

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 1:17:00 PM  
Blogger BrownsvilleGirl said...

haha Tova.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 2:12:00 PM  
Blogger Elster said...


Does this mean that you want to have a baby???

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 4:21:00 PM  
Anonymous brown eyed girl said...

i like causing chaos, making trouble, starting fights, you know, all the fun stuff that makes for a good time. :-D

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 4:49:00 PM  
Blogger Elster said...


There's nothing worse than a journal with naked chicks with Pink Floyd backs that is unopenable because it's password protected. Except maybe drowning to death.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 5:30:00 PM  
Blogger BrownsvilleGirl said...

Well, Elster, it isn't so bad because she was linking to someone else's livejournal anyway. :)

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 5:49:00 PM  
Anonymous brown eyed girl said...

and i'm sorry, but it has to be friends only. dina stalkers are nice stalkers... mine aren't so nice. also, i have students who found my journal... and i don't think they should be reading on my life.

you're more then welcome to read it. you don't have to write in your journal, but you do need to sign up to read mine.

everyone else did. all the ccool kids are doing it... you know you want to. peer pressure!

Wednesday, September 21, 2005 11:23:00 AM  
Blogger Elster said...

Alas BEG:

Your reasons for privacy seem valid. However, I can barely keep up with what I have now: a blog, 34 phoney IM names (just joking), various e-mails; another thnig would just put me over the edge.

Unless, of course, it was a REALLY good journal.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005 11:54:00 AM  
Anonymous brown eyed girl said...

well, if you can stand grammatical errors, bad spelling and probably a whole bunch of freudian slips, (bascially someone who never proofreads). i would say it's pretty decent. but how good it is, well, i think each person has their own opinion.

Thursday, September 22, 2005 9:37:00 AM  

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