And for My Thethith

I love quoting The Offive. I also love quoting real life people who I know and love. Also, sometimes but not often, I'll quote myself. I repeat--NOT OFTEN. Anyway, I was thinking about how much I like remembering certain lines that friends have said because there are times when I'll pull them out of my memory. For example, Chaya once said, "y'know--I really just don't like girls." That wasn't a very good example. Three summers ago, Doni said, "I just heard that a bunch of guys in the grade above me got married. I guess they had nothing better to do." Lucky for him, he met Miryam shortly after that line was spoken and realized that there are other reasons people get married. And at the time, I had a good quote.
The weird part is when someone will tell me something that reminds me of something a friend once said a long time ago and then I'll be too embarrassed to point out that I remember odd details, but that's okay. My point is that if I tell you you said something just believe me. I may have terrible short term memory and even worse word retrieval, but I really do remember lines and exchanges. Here are a few of my recent favorites.

"What? You're drinking coffee every time I see you!"
"But never with caffeine."
"You are out of control."
"Out of control! I am completely out of control!"

"That old lady's you."
"No, she's me."
"She's you and you."
"I meant she's me and you. You and me."

"How are you?"
"Doing well."
"What time did you get in last night?"
"12:30. Well, no I mean 1:30, I left 2:30. 12:30. I got home 1:00."
"Let's start over. How are you?"
"Not as well as I thought I was."

"Oh no! Look--there's a stain on the carpet."
"See? This is what happens when you eat in the house."

"Excuse me while I interrupt your face."

Others, like "your Life is becoming a soggy mess," are best in context. That time someone asked my mother to make him cereal and then went to watch tv. When my mother told him that the cereal was ready and he couldn't eat in the den and had to come to the table, he threw a tantrum. He had a complete and total meltdown that he couldn't eat and watch tv at the same time. After trying to rationalize with him and realizing that wouldn't work, my mother said, "just stop crying. Your Life is becoming a soggy mess." It was so amazing that I smile at how hard all three of us (my mother, the crier, and I) laughed.
Another good example of context is when I was driving with a friend and I think that at some point I put a drink down in the cup holder and accidentally hit the seat warmer thing without realizing it. Anyway, neither of us had said anything for a very long time and then out of nowhere came the, "why's my back getting hot?" Okay, that doesn't sound funny even when I put it in context. I guess for some you just had to be there.
Which reminds me of something else that was said this Shabbos. Everyone at the table was laughing over something I didn't hear.
"What's so funny?"
"Oh nothing."
"No, tell me."
"What ever, you had to be there."
"But I was there."
That too is not so funny. Actually, that sounds rather depressing.
In other news, remember QOTD?

"You see--a little bit of light and suddenly you realize everybody's not a snake." Shabbat shalom.

A Little Known Fact About Chaya is that My Brother Used to Call Her "Cool Dude". . . When We Were Awkward 9th Graders

Once upon a time, I went into the city to meet a friend who was going to look at rings. She was getting engaged and her then-future fiance wanted her to get a sense of what she liked and what looked good on her. To be honest, I didn't even try on a single ring (okay, I tried on one and it looked terribly large and I took it right off) and the only thing I did was measure my ring size because that's just a convenient thing to know. So my highlight was when one of the diamond guys complimented me on the ring I got for $10 at the Nyack Street Fair.
Later that day, my friend went back to whence she came and I went out on a date. Before going on the date, I decided that, "I went ring shopping!" was possibly one of the scariest things a girl could tell a date, so I stuck with a, "my friend had some errands to do." Which was true. It was an errand. Then a friend and I were trying to think of a list of the no-nos to say on a date and only, "I'm pregnant" ranked higher than talking about ring shopping. And while I haven't done a QOTD in forever, I think Steve's--"WHAT? I gave up pork for that girl and this is how she repays me?"--response last night to my telling him that Chaya got engaged was priceless.
Have a Shabbat Shalom and Chag Sameach.